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Rover:
So was the spider!

Lesley:
Ah so spider man is still there then is he.........Promise you was a lovely sunny day clear blue skies and 28c beach being cleaned shops and everything in San Stefanos is awake and awaiting all.......

Rover:
No problem, spider was on lens cleaning duty!

Jimbo:
Posh taverna! Those spiders cost twice as much per hour as an Albanian...

EDIT

I've just had an email from an Albanian spider offering to do the job for half what the Greek spider's getting paid.

EDIT

I've just had an email from an Albanian bloke called Xhemail offering to undercut whatever deal the Albanian spider gets, stamp on Stavroula, the Black Widow Webcam Washer of Waves, and lick the cat pee off benson's Mythos. All this for a Sizzling Steak at Little Prince once a week and a signed photo of Cerys in her bikini.

EDIT

Stavroula has just posted a picture on Facebook of herself wearing a bikini. Interesting garment if you have eight legs. Actually, not that boring with two.

EDIT

I have replied to the Albanian voyeur thus:

"Dear e-mail, thank you for your Xhemail.

Unfortunately, Cerys does not do signed photos any more. She only does TV. However, as her agent, and as a fluent Welsh-speaker, for a small consideration around the 200,000,000,000 Leks area I may be able to help. Mixalis at Little Prince says that, whilst he is not prepared to give you Sizzling Steak, he would be happy for you to serve it, as he hates doing it himself.

You should take comfort from the fact that the Albanian football team is ranked one above Wales in the region at an impressive 25th, although I will not give this information to Cerys, who is not a woman lightly mocked.

I am sorry that there are no suitable vacancies at the moment, and I wish you good luck in future applications.

Yours etc."

Dupnica:
 Brilliantly funny! I loved that.

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