Pig Flu

[tonyco1]

Ok - I know you were waiting for this -
The new Holiday Film on San Stefanos, is called "One flu over the halals nest",
a film dedicated to B L T's, sweet & sour, and sausages!!
A bit like the Blair witch project, it was filmed on the nudie beach with Jules Camcorder and features scenes unfit for children to watch.
Scene's of flagellation, as Peter, Don and Zimmer are rounded up by the "Force" (Sue, Jules, stressed and Zoe),
and whipped soundly with strings of sausages, until their goose (or Hog-roast) was cooked, while simmering on a sunbed.
Cries of "don't stop", "More-more-more" from the boys, whilst coughing germs the size of cooked hams,
in the direction of italy and Sidari. Meanwhile a Game of "Back-Gammon", in full swing, and the rest of us in face-masks, playing ''will the real Michael Jackson'' please stand up!!
All this and more - on channel 4!!

[don]

The news in brief from Corfu

In Sidari the Three PIGS has been quarantined! Probably in vain as no tourists been there in the last 6 months. Unfortunately the big bad wolf caught flu from the Three PIGS and blew their house down. Not with a huff and a puff (no homophobia or pigophobia intended),  but with an almighty Sneeze!
Further round the coast In little San Stefanos the Condor bar has at last found out that Elvis is dead. A shock to the poor Greeks I know. They have though managed , for the older generation - Yes Tony And Chris I mean you! - HOGGY Carmichael who will be accompanied on the HAMmond organ while performing a selection from PORKY and Bess!
At the top of the hill the RoHAMza is reeling after losing a few of their staff. The owners now admit to being HAMstrung.
In Corfu Town itself the Cricket pitch is looking ahead to a bright future. There will be an exhibition match played by teams run by that West Indies legend RoHAM Kanhai and David Gower late of HAMpshire and England.
Well that looks to be the end of the news as my HAMbulance has just arrived!

[Colin]

The news in brief from Corfu

In Sidari the Three PIGS has been quarantined! Probably in vain as no tourists been there in the last 6 months. Unfortunately the big bad wolf caught flu from the Three PIGS and blew their house down. Not with a huff and a puff (no homophobia or pigophobia intended),  but with an almighty Sneeze!
Further round the coast In little San Stefanos the Condor bar has at last found out that Elvis is dead. A shock to the poor Greeks I know. They have though managed , for the older generation - Yes Tony And Chris I mean you! - HOGGY Carmichael who will be accompanied on the HAMmond organ while performing a selection from PORKY and Bess!
At the top of the hill the RoHAMza is reeling after losing a few of their staff. The owners now admit to being HAMstrung.
In Corfu Town itself the Cricket pitch is looking ahead to a bright future. There will be an exhibition match played by teams run by that West Indies legend RoHAM Kanhai and David Gower late of HAMpshire and England.
Well that looks to be the end of the news as my HAMbulance has just arrived!

I think that there will be one or two DurHAM players on show too Don. Steve HAMison perhaps?
When I woke up this morning I thought I had pig Flu, owing to the fact I had a 'Rasher' on my forehead!

[LILOLIL]

Well what can I say... this is great fun i thought I was the nutty one.Don I think an HAMBULANCE is the order of the day for you.xx

[LILOLIL]

Pinky and Perky can be seen on the beach Capt Nikos has said he will take them paragliding, then we will see PIGS FLY!!!!!They hope the weather is fine because they are only in San Stefanos for a Weeeeeeek!!

[don]

Surely the afternoon films at the Condor have to feature PIGmalian..... PORKys......  A TROTTER full of Dollars....... The Good The Bad & The PORKER! ...... The PORKfather...... SOWth Of the Border

[stressed0506]

and for anyone who is/was a fan of " i'm sorry i haven't a clue....."   bring me the Alfredo Garcia..... with an orange...

[Jules]

Just don't go making any rash(er) decisions!!!!!!!!!

[stressed0506]

oops i missed a head of out of there!

[tonyco1]

I think we have HAMmered this one - you swines!!!
The Condor is also showing at 16:30 next week - - - "Swine flu over the Cukoo's nest"
The new bar "Porkys" is in quarantine, it's a PIG but there you are!!
The new Art Studio, "BABE" is showing scratchings by local artists,
Do you think it's time to 'rind' it up?
The local police have a new snout!!
The motorbike shop has a new line of "HOGs" for hire!!
Don't listen to Curly (Don), it's another Tail!!
Oh well - time to Trotter off!!

[LILOLIL]

Pinky and Perky have just found a bargain holiday to corFLu.They will have to fly to HAMSTERDAM then on to HAMBURG then on to corFLU.Nothing to be SNEEZED at.When in corFLU they drove to arillas for petrol,perky confused Pinky,by saying he was looking for Mexico,but reminded him he was looking for Texaco.Perky told pinky he was fed up of being taken for GRUNTED,beacuse he was a SLOWLOINER when driving around CorFLU.The temp was ARIND 25 degrees so they headed to the beach of San Stefanos.Perky found the beach quite BOARING so went for a jog up the nice end of the beach!!! whilst TROTTING back past Nikos snack bar in the ROASTING sunshine he fell over.Help he shouted I think i have pulled my HAMSTRING.Nikos phoned for an HAMBULANCE,that took him to corFLU hospital.Pinky later that night sat in the Condor bar all alone drinking TEQUILLA(mexican),with Stefanos,hoping that Perky would soon be CURED, to come back to San Stefanos for the rest of his holiday.
All the boys and Piglets say  ahhhh poor old perkyxxx
Next episode soon.

[don]

Pinky and Perky have just found a bargain holiday to corFLu.They will have to fly to HAMSTERDAM then on to HAMBURG then on to corFLU.Nothing to be SNEEZED at.When in corFLU they drove to arillas for petrol,perky confused Pinky,by saying he was looking for Mexico,but reminded him he was looking for Texaco.Perky told pinky he was fed up of being taken for GRUNTED,beacuse he was a SLOWLOINER when driving around CorFLU.The temp was ARIND 25 degrees so they headed to the beach of San Stefanos.Perky found the beach quite BOARING so went for a jog up the nice end of the beach!!! whilst TROTTING back past Nikos snack bar in the ROASTING sunshine he fell over.Help he shouted I think i have pulled my HAMSTRING.Nikos phoned for an HAMBULANCE,that took him to corFLU hospital.Pinky later that night sat in the Condor bar all alone drinking TEQUILLA(mexican),with Stefanos,hoping that Perky would soon be CURED, to come back to San Stefanos for the rest of his holiday.
All the boys and Piglets say  ahhhh poor old perkyxxx
Next episode soon.

Hilarious..... Absolutely Hilarious.................... Your post not Tonyco's Avatar 

[Jules]

Pinky and Perky have just found a bargain holiday to corFLu.They will have to fly to HAMSTERDAM then on to HAMBURG then on to corFLU.Nothing to be SNEEZED at.When in corFLU they drove to arillas for petrol,perky confused Pinky,by saying he was looking for Mexico,but reminded him he was looking for Texaco.Perky told pinky he was fed up of being taken for GRUNTED,beacuse he was a SLOWLOINER when driving around CorFLU.The temp was ARIND 25 degrees so they headed to the beach of San Stefanos.Perky found the beach quite BOARING so went for a jog up the nice end of the beach!!! whilst TROTTING back past Nikos snack bar in the ROASTING sunshine he fell over.Help he shouted I think i have pulled my HAMSTRING.Nikos phoned for an HAMBULANCE,that took him to corFLU hospital.Pinky later that night sat in the Condor bar all alone drinking TEQUILLA(mexican),with Stefanos,hoping that Perky would soon be CURED, to come back to San Stefanos for the rest of his holiday.
All the boys and Piglets say  ahhhh poor old perkyxxx
Next episode soon.

Just brillaint Lilolil 

[lainey]

first time to ss for us in june . sounds like my kind of place... your all bonkers. love it

[tonyco1]

first time to ss for us in june . sounds like my kind of place... your all bonkers. love it

It makes you like that!!! Good old SS!!